My First Love, Pt. 2

I remember throwing my office phone. I was in serious rage. If it weren’t for my manager coming in to make sure I was ok, the computer would have gotten it also. He called me at my job. I still loved him. We were, at this point, still speaking of being together. Why did I have to ask if he cheated on me while in basic training? I wanted honesty, after all, I was still waiting on him. I’d tell you what he said, but it’s a bit graphic. I’m sure my explained reaction above pretty much sums it up. It’s ok to assume at this point. Anyway, at this point, I was done. I wanted nothing more to do with him, and I made this perfectly clear to him. If he didn’t understand this, I’m sure he understood the multiple threats I made to him. He knew, at the time, I was sincere with my threats.

About two years ago, I was at home, getting out of the shower. It was around 3am when I heard the doorbell ring. Everyone in my house was asleep. I just knew someone was ringing the wrong doorbell. They had to be looking for the neighbors bell. In effort not to wake anyone in the house, I quickly threw on a robe, and ran down the stairs. Still wet from the shower, and hair still wrapped in my scarf. I opened the inside door to see who it was, and tell the person that he was CLEARLY ringing the wrong doorbell. When I looked through the glass on the outside door, the face took me back, my palms got sweaty, and my stomach started churning. I must be seeing things. At 3am, I opened the front door…it was him!
I couldn’t believe it. He returned to my front door, as if it was ok, ten years later. I was happy and pissed at the same time. Why was he here? He said he had to talk to me. He got a “record deal” and nothing seemed right to him. He found it hard to enjoy life without me. He needed me there. Yeah, ok! Then, the light switch clicked on in my head. I was on my way to pick my boyfriend up. Dude’s timing was waayyyy off! I was seeing someone. I was “happy”. But, there was curiosity in the back of my head. I told him I had to finish getting dressed and that I was on my way out. He said that he would take my friend and I wherever we needed to go. WHAT? I sooo declined! That would have been me picking out my coffin. I’d rather not. I gave him my cell number and told him I’d be done at 4:30am, to call me then. Why did I give him my number…geez…what is wrong with me? On my drive to pick up my boyfriend, I phoned my father and told him what happened. He found it rather funny. On my way into the city, around 4:15am..he called. My cell phone rang at 4:15am. My boyfriend looked at me as if I had 6 heads and asked who is calling me at that time of the night. I told him it was an old friend of mine. He told me to answer the phone then. WAY AKWARD SITUATION! My boyfriend ended up getting pissed and accused me of cheating. I had done no such thing! But, I would have said the same thing. Why couldn’t dude just follow simple instructions?
He met me at my house. I parked my car and got into his. I wanted to hear what he had to say. If nothing else, it would be closure for me. He took me back to his house. So many memories, good, happy memories. I listened, and didn’t say anything. It was difficult, but I needed to know what happened. When he was finished, I calmly explained the damage he had done. He begged me for another chance. I told him we could take it one day at a time. I wasn’t sure about him. I had been through a lot in his absence. I had grown a lot. I was not the same 16year old he cheated on, then left. Threats are reality. I would do what I said I would if I had to, I’m just saying. He said he was willing to work for me, for us.
He drove me to work, and told me to call him when I was ready to go. I have my own car. Why did I allow him to drive me to work? Why did I leave my car at home?
When we pulled up to my job, everyone was watching me get out of his car. I explained to everyone what was happening and they were excited for me. They were so excited that it became contagious. I was getting more excited by the second. A few hours later, I called him and told him I was ready to leave. He said he was on his way. A bit later, he sent me a text message that read, “I see you”. I blushed. I thought that was cute. He called me back and said he was across the street, and he had something to show me when I got to the car. Uhhh Ohhh!
If you didn’t know by now, Amber doesn’t do surprises. If you want to surprise me, just do it. Don’t ever forewarn me. IT PISSES ME OFF!!! I got scared and worried. I asked him what he needed to show me. He said just come outside. I said NO, what is it? He, again, said, just come to the car.
I get to the car, and I don’t get in. Instead, I look into the car. I glance at him, and then I glanced into the back of the car….THERE WERE TWO CHILDREN BACK THERE!!!
I asked, whose are those. He said those are my boys…sounding like those are his homeboys.
Again I asked, whose are those. Then the oldest said, Daddy, I’m hungry. WHAT??! Ok, lets add this up. Two kids in the car, plus the little girl that he made when he cheated on me equals THREE children. Ok, did he forget that he had kids? Nope, this was what he wanted to show me. Why couldn’t he tell me last night that he had more kids? Then he tells me that he was married, but separated.
ARE YOU REALLY PUTTING ME THROUGH THIS DRAMA?!

To be continued...